House Tour :: Dining Room 2

I never feel like any of the rooms in my house are "complete."  There is always something that could be prettier, or flow better, or be more personal, or whatever.

Well, I can't say never any more.  I am now completely content with my dining room and have zero plans to change anything, until the bookcase can't handle another book.  And in that case, all I have to do is purge the book collection!  No need to expand the bookcase, though it is expandable.

When my friend Sarah came to do our 2012 mugshots this winter, she also shot the dining room. I just love her beautiful photography.  I sure wish I had her talent!

This past winter, I bought a sideboard at Stacks.  I needed some storage for table linens, vases, other glassware and entertaining items.  You can see the sideboard below the window.

 

Because the sideboard had very tall openings for the shelves, I used a West Elm store credit I had to buy four baskets (they are called "magazine bags") to store the linens and some extra serving utensils.  I placed them on the top shelf all the way across.

Years ago, my mother-in-law, Cheryl, gave me some fancy glass entertaining trays, along with glass punch cups.  I love them so much, but they have been stored in the garage for years... I had no place to put them.  So, they were never used!  Now, they live in the sideboard and I can't wait to use them some time... maybe the next time I have some ladies over.  There's even a little slit in the glass so you can rest your cigarette while you eat your food.

Also, please note the Nerf dart under the sideboard in the photo above.  These things are seriously everywhere in my house.  I am glad Sarah chose not to edit it out.  This is just the real deal.


With the addition of the sideboard, I added curtains from World Market.  The print is a floral on a greenish-yellow background.  I couldn't find the link, and I don't remember the name of the print!  The sheers are called Sahaj Ivory Curtains with Jute Stripes.  I removed the white vinyl blinds that originally came with the house and stored them in the attic.  I much prefer the look of the curtains versus the blinds.  Makes the room feel a bit more formal and finished, though both the print and the stripe lend a bit of funk.

Before I bought the sideboard, I had the small console table below the window. It is from Kirkland's (believe it or not) and I love the shape of it.  It was too small for the space I originally had it in, but we made it work.  Now, it lives on the short wall to the left of the window and sideboard.   It is nice for display and polish to the room, but even nicer to be able to set a pitcher of tea or extra dishes there when we have company.

Ever have a random thing that you think is cool but you have no idea what to do with it?  That's how I felt about my husband's old, old music book full of drum rudiments.  I liked it, but what do I do with it?  It ended up laying around and almost accidentally becoming a base for a little candle display.  Candles are from TJ Maxx.

Let's revisit the overall photo... see the Ikea Stockholm bookcases?

Sarah took close ups of the shelves.  A few of my favorites  ::

Hey!  It's a Cookwire shot of a Cookwire shot!  Black and white photo is from early 2010.

I like the shelf below because of the shallow silver pedestal bowl that houses several of Dave's fossils.  It's like a subtle surprise and when people notice it, the display itself invites them to pick the rocks up and take a closer look.

To the right of the bookcase is an antique church pew.  It is unusual in its size... it's just the right size to hold a single person.  Especially if a single person needs a few moments by themselves to settle down and refocus themselves after offending a brother.  Or a mother.  Or a father.  Yes, it has become somewhat of a time-out bench, but I think everyone in the family likes the piece.  So far, no one associates it solely with discipline.  :)

Dressing for an Alabama Summer :: Round 2

Last summer, I decided the way to keep cool in hellish southern heat was to wear dresses a lot.  It was a great idea in theory, but in reality, it only worked okay for me.  Part of the problem was that I forgot to consider that if my dresses needed layering, like a tank or even, ahem, Spanx, those kinds of undergarments basically render dresses *not cool.* For me.

I think I have nailed down my summer 2012 uniform.  [Please, please, sweet reader, bear in mind that this is not a fashion blog.  This is a blog about how I make my life easier, or neater, or simpler.]

Ready for it?  Well, there's two parts:  the at-home uniform, and the out-and-about uniform.

***  At-home uniform = running shorts and a t-shirt, preferably some sort of cooling/wicking shirt.

This shouldn't be a problem, as this is already the unofficial uniform of University of Alabama and Auburn women.  And there's a reason for it... it works to keep you cool.  I wish I could find some sort of photo or blog post to share about this uniform.  Couldn't find something easily, so I am going to make it my mission to take photos of this uniform to share with all my Northern readers.

***  Out-and-about Uniform = jersey (*not* synthetic) dresses, walking shorts that aren't too long paired with sleeveless cotton or jersey tops, and anything that reminds me of being at the beach (whatever that means).

This isn't anything profound, but I feel like it has been helpful for me to nail this down.  After three summers here in Alabama, here are some things that are really, really BAD to wear in terms of comfort:

• Synthetic knit dresses.  They stick to your skin and feel disgusting.
• Jeans... I'm sorry, they are just not an option for me in the summer.  Too, too restrictive and hot.  Have I mentioned it's hot here?
• Anything that I have to layer in order to preserve modesty.  It's too much bulk, too  much to fiddle with to make sure the layers aren't bunching and, yes, it's hot.

Things that are really, really BAD for summer wear in terms of my body type and how they make me look and feel:

• Shorts that are too long.  I'm 5'3" and pear shaped.  Though I like the idea of wearing a longer short because of coverage, I look like a complete idiot.  Long shorts make me look wider and shorter.  No, thanks.
• Capris.  See explanation above.  And, may I take a moment to go off on capris right now?  I have been doing some casual observations, and my conclusion is that most women should NEVER ever wear them.  You have to be tallish and thin and they have to be the right cut for them to look good.  Short, bottom-heavy women wearing denim capris that are hard to tell if they are high water jeans or just cropped pants.... this is very, very bad.

I have purchased a few things, mostly at Land's End, to get me started for this year.  I bought several jersey tanks at the LE in Sears because I think they are pretty, and also because I am in love with the satisfaction-guarantee at LE.  I am so very sick of my cutest tops falling apart... that means you Loft, Old Navy, Banana Republic and Gap.  Either you're selling a crap product, or my front-loader washing machine selectively destroys your  shirts, and not any shirts that belong to the rest of my family.

Links to uniform items so far this season:

Tank in Sisal Print

Tank in Tawny

Tank in White

Shorts in Silver Pink  (These have a 7" inseam... still may be a bit long for me, but I'll have to wear them a few times to decide.)

Cover-up in Tide Pool Aqua

Kimono Dress in Black  

Running Shorts, various (The loose ones, not tight/compression shorts.)

I'm keeping my eyes peeled for some linen tops, a linen dress, and maybe a maxi dress (this, I don't care if I am too short for... I just love maxi dresses).  I also need to replace my seen-better-days sandals from last year.  

Anyone else care to share their summer uniform?  I love it when you comment!  Thank you, my friends!

Quiet, Not Perfect

Today, my mind can't focus. I can't seem to figure out what I should be doing, or even what I want to do. I am pushing through by doing odds and ends around the house and yard, but it doesn't feel good. I have felt like this all week, really. I am in recovery mode from Erin's wedding, the traveling, and just surviving a week as a single parent. I wonder how I'd be doing this week if I were still deeply entrenched in Facebook and other people's business. I can't even handle my own business; why did I think I could keep up with everyone else's?

I'm reading a book I like called Simple Life by Thom Rainer and Art Rainer. Well, I like the first part on time management. The second part that I am reading right now is fairly standard on healthy relationships and hasn't been as eye-opening as the first part. There was so much good stuff in the first section about aligning how we spend our time with what we state our priorities are. I took tons of notes. It only makes sense... we all have a list of our priorities; but do our days' activities reflect our priorities at all? Often, they don't.  Everyone should do this... actually write out your top 5 or so priorities in life.  Then, on another piece of paper, write out your typical days' schedule.  Then you compare... do your days reflect your priorities?

I really loved a section in the book about balance. It talked about how everyone chases balance, but maybe balance isn't a good goal. Instead, it talks about “focus” being a better goal. Once we know what our focus is in life (or in a season, or whatever), it is easier to be productive and make better decisions about how to spend our time. So, we may seem “unbalanced” towards our priorities... but that is not the same as “imbalanced,” which doesn't at all allow for accomplishing goals.

And, like every good time management book, the authors remind the reader that being focused and effective will mean saying “no” to lots of good things. It got me thinking more about what good (or even great) things I am saying “no” to right now, as I consider how I want our family's summer to be.

My list of “no's” is subject to change... I can't make hard and fast rules for myself or I go over the edge to complete legalism and rigidity. But, so far, here are things I am likely to say “no” to right now.

• Camps of any sort for my kids (including sports, art, Bible school).
• Extra church décor projects.
• Regular evening obligations, including my beloved discipleship group.
• Very limited traveling. This one is hard for me. We are going to Florida as a family on our regular vacation that we take every year to the same place. We also will go to Pittsburgh, PA, for Dave's 20^th high school reunion, and extend the visit so we will have some vacation time with his family. I might go to see my parents in Louisiana, especially now that our county schools have mandated a later start date for school. So that's two, maybe three, big trips. (If you know me in real life and love me and are reading this, please, I beg you... don't ask me to go on any extra trips.)

Back to my strange, moody day... I hate feeling this way, because it feels like a waste of a day. It says in the Simple Life. “The present matters. Your day matters.” The authors say that in a section of the book that talks about living in the present, so that you can move towards your goals and priorities. I certainly am not moving toward any goal today, even if that goal was relaxation! But, I am trying to give myself a break considering my circumstances of a stressful couple of weeks, and just let it be.  

Dallas and Back

I hit Dallas last week for my friend Erin's wedding... I was her matron of honor and it was indeed an honor to help her with all the shopping, planning, running around, and all the other duties that come with planning a wedding.

A few photos from my cell phone are below.  I can't wait to see the real wedding photos..  Erin also had a "photo booth" at the reception, complete with props.  Those will be the real gems, I suspect.  I hope to post a few of me and my friend Jen, if I can get ahold of the jpegs.  We tried our hardest to look our worst for those.

My updo... an old-fashioned looking bun on the side.  I loved it.  Had to blindly choose a salon three days before the wedding. Thankfully, the stylist was amazing. She was at the Michael Raymond Salon in Dallas.

My dear friend Jen, also part of the wedding party, and her fancy updo.  She is wearing earrings the bride gave her for the wedding.  She wanted to die, because she loves huge flashy fun jewelry.

The sister of the bride, Ebony, and the bride, fixing hair and making a point (*see the finger).  

Eb and me... friends since elementary school.

Jen and me, ready for the ceremony to begin.

The bride, post wedding.  Erin's make up looked spectacular... she got it done at the MAC counter that morning.

The bridal party went to get photos done after the ceremony... these will be so cool with the Dallas skyline and the Big White Bridge to Nowhere in the background.

My sweet wedding date, Calvin.  He was a the best travel companion ever, running errands to Costco, and hopping flights with the best of us!

Quieting : Day 19

The overwhelming flow of information and stimulation in my life has slowed down significantly in the last 19 days.  I almost can't even remember what life on Facebook was like, and this is a surprising thing to happen in a short period of time.  Who knew FB detox would take less than three weeks?  I feel like I have joined back into my life.  My life never stopped... it's just that now I feel more present in it.

I am traveling to Texas soon, for my friend Erin's wedding. It has been so nice to pleasantly and almost leisurely anticipate the flight, errands, the decorating, rehearsal, bachelorette party, getting dolled up, and... of course ... standing up for my friend.  I have been able to enter into the "looking forward to" more than I have in the recent past.  Big events have sneaked up on me, with little mental or emotional preparation and they were over in a whirlwind before I knew it.  This week before the wedding has felt very different.

As excited as I am about the wedding, I am also looking forward to it being nearly the last of my big extracurricular activities before summer break.  I am defending my slow and quiet summer, like you wouldn't believe.  I am saying no to things that I might have said yes to in past summers. I almost feel defensive, as if I have to protect my time with my kids like a mean mama bear.

****

I am ending my unintentional "Quieting" series today.  I don't think that quieting will ever be a finished process, since there is always something demanding time and attention in our culture.  But, I feel better prepared to protect this part of my life than before... and I think I will sooner recognize frantic-ness in my mind that is the symptom of it all being just too much.

An Adoption Update :: May 2012

A few significant things are happening with our adoption.  Because of developments today, and because of a friend's inspiration, I have decided to document the adoption a bit better, mostly so that my kids can look back at the timeline, but also so that our whole family can be reminded of God's faithfulness through the adoption process.  A bonus would be that my documentation would help someone else out in some way.  Another friend said, "You'll never know how many people might be affected by your future child's adoption."  So, I am posting it here.  I am toying around with the idea of video journaling, but I am not yet sure.

Today we got our Alabama state child abuse and neglect clearances back.  I literally prayed this morning that the Lord would bring them back today.  Today!  We had already submitted them last year when we started our homestudy, but they expired after a year.  I am not sure why this homestudy is taking so long.  When we did our first one in 2007, I am certain it only took a few months.  Regardless, getting this form back today was huge.  Now, a couple of minor touch ups and our homestudy can be put to bed.

Once our other agency in Denver gets the homestudy and looks through it, we can apply for immigration.  This was first accomplished back in 2007 or 2008, but everything expired and changed since then.  We didn't renew since we knew it would be years before we could potentially get a match.  I wish we would have worked on the renewing before now, but as cliche as it sounds, this is God's timing.  I really believe that.

Once immigration is applied for, we can then get a match, even while we wait 60-90 days for immigration approval.  This is big news for me today because my understanding was that a match wasn't possible until immigration was done.  This news could mean that we are 60-90 days closer to travel then I originally thought.  After we get a match, traveling to China to pick up our baby will happen in five to six months.

The reason a match is so close is because we are going to adopt a mild special needs child.  We are looking at minor correctable issues at this point.  Our agency just sent two medical teams to China and they saw a ton of kids.  Once their files are ready for potential parents to look through in a couple of months, we should be ready to look through the files to find our child.  I can hardly believe that we may have a match by mid-to-late summer.

Walking in Latvia

A friend who moved to Latvia last year emailed an interesting response to my post about being a pedestrian in a non-walking culture.  Here is her email (posted with permission)  ::


"Loved your post about pedestrian safety. I have also become more pedestrian aware since we moved.  A huge portion of residents here don't have a car and walk/bus everywhere.  Also, limited and inconsistent sidewalks.   Add to that our 5hrs of day light in the winter and you have an entire region that's crazy about pedestrian visibility.

There are huge billboards on the freeways reminding people to wear reflectors when they walk.  Children's coats and bags are designed with huge reflective strips on the arms and legs. Adults have dangling reflectors on bags and coats.  Bicyclists always wear yellow or orange vests if they're on the roads."

My friend's son, wearing his vest on a walk....

... and his first grade class wearing safety vests while on a field trip.

I am planning to get Tucker a safety vest made for kids, as well as a safety whip or two so that Calvin can contribute to pedestrian visibilty from the stroller.  I think he'll like waving these at the traffic as we enter the sidewalk-less, speedbump-less, crosswalk-less school property.

If money was no obstacle, I'd get the Cadillac of safety whips.  Think if we walked with a couple of these that people would get the message that they should slow down, be aware of walkers and actually yield to them?  Or do you think this sounds like overkill?  Well, on vacation last year, we saw newly-installed flag containers for pedestrians to wave at drivers while they crossed the street to get to the beach, near Tampa, Florida.

If the rest of the world considers walking a reasonable mode of transportation, why can't we?  Come on, south-of-Birmingham.... [push play]....

Dear Dr Techno :: My Computer is Slow

In Decent Order and Dr Techno join forces!

Check out my brother Alex's Q and A with me about fixing my slow and sad little netbook.  That is, if you're geek enough.

Ever heard of a little thing called Ubuntu? A shot of my netbook screen.

**** Update 4/28/2012****

Alex's post made it onto The Verge.   Check it!

Quieting :: Day 8 and Links

I have read a few relevant blog posts since I have taken some dramatic (well, dramatic for me) steps to quiet the noise in my life and reevaluate what it is I am doing with my time and my mind.

Nester wrote about not doing a project, just for the sake of doing a project,as well as being content with her house being nearly done.  Amen, amen, amen, sister.  I wish I would have written this post.  

Desiring God had a post about the everyday sacrifice of motherhood.  It had me thinking a lot about sacrificing fun things or interesting things that I want to do for the sake of my children.  Quieting the noise in my life benefits me, for sure.  Even more so, it is a sacrifice for my kids.  

My husband sent me another Desiring God post about compulsive mobility and busyness.  My favorite part ::  "So we love journey for the thrill, not where it's taking us. We are here and there and back to here, so wrapped up in what's happening that we've made tomorrow colorless. We've bleached our future with an indulgence in present busyness."

Lastly, my brother Alex, aka Dr Techno, wrote about ditching Facebook in a post called "Facebook is the Best, Facebook is the Worst."  He unplugged from Crackbook FB several months before I did, for different reasons (mine were related to having too much information and distraction in my life).   His post has some great stuff, and was featured on the front page of TheVerge.com, gaining a good buzz for a young blog.  Anyhow, his post added to my feeling that leaving the social network behind, or at least in "deactivation limbo," was a good choice for me.  

****

Day 8 has been good.  I planted several plants that I had purchased from the nursery weeks ago.  Calvin helped me and somehow, I was able to consciously keep in mind that my task wasn't to get the plants in the ground, but rather to involve Calvin, listen to him as he helped, correct him gently if needed.  And if I got all 11 plants in the ground... well, that was the bonus.  And that did happen.  Moments like that are worth celebrating and remembering since I am not always conscientious about how I combine parenting and projects in a child-respectful way.  

Speaking of respecting children, I have noticed how often I hurry my children.  If I had a nickel for every time I said some variation of "Come on, let's go!" or "Focus so we won't be late!"... i'd have a lot of nickels.  I recently started apologizing to Tucker for hurrying him.  It really is my fault... usually it's because I haven't given enough notice or didn't give enough margin for error for getting out of the house.  I don't ever remember my mother hurrying me or my four siblings.  It probably happened at times, but the point is that I don't remember those few times.  I fear that by constantly rushing my kids (and consequently barking at them or saying things I shouldn't), they are going to remember their childhood as very busy and pressured.  No, thanks.  I'd rather respect their age and developmental stages by not hurrying them.   This time of quieting has helped the hurrying problem, thankfully... I haven't had to set reminders around the house to slow down, yet.  I still may do that if needed. 

One last note for the day.... and it is bittersweet.  Tucker, who is six and a half, came home from school and we discovered that he had three loose teeth!  Tears burned my eyes when I confirmed that, for real, for sure, those three teeth were wiggling.  How can such a silly thing make me glad and sad at the same time?  I love his baby-toothed smile and will miss it.  A friend once said something about how hard it is for your child to lose the first teeth that you, as a mother, were so thrilled to find erupting when he was a baby. 

May 2006 -- First teeth sprouting up @ 8 months old.

February 2012, a full set of sweet baby teeth at nearly 6 1/2 years old.  Photo by Erin Nolen.

Walking

I started walking my 6-year-old son to school in January.  My goal was to get more exercise (it's a little over 2 miles roundtrip), creating a shared experience for me and the boys, and to feel more involved in the  life of the school.

As I trotted home from our school walk this morning, I couldn't help but be grateful that all of these goals are happening.  Tucker is now fully on board with the walk, with few complaints and only rarely needs a break.  We discovered a shortcut through a shallow drainage ditch which saves a few minutes on the way to school, and also is kind of adventuresome.  We always look for the same white cat in a certain window, and it is fun to greet two beautiful huskies that wait for us to walk past.  I often point out different plants to the kids, and now we are in the habit of calling out in sing-song voices, "Don't touch the pampas grass!" whenever we  walk past a particularly huge clump of it.  Tucker is learning to identify lots of plants and seems to be enjoying noticing these small details.

I still fear crossing the county road that is directly in front of the school, due to the heavy traffic and the lack of pedestrian awareness.  The principal, as well as the town police, have been super supportive of us crossing this road.  They all know how important it is to me because we have had a few incidents come up that have given us opportunities to talk about it.  I always thank whichever officer is stopping traffic for us each morning, and this morning in particular, I told him how much I appreciate him and the other officers, as I jogged across the road.

To make crossing that road safer, I started putting a safety vest on Tucker.  I remind him daily how important it is to increase his visibility to the drivers and so he never balks at putting it on.  It is an adult-sized vest, so he swims in it.  But, it's accomplishing two goals... increasing his visibility and it sends the message that I am concerned that drivers don't see us.  Does that make sense?  I want drivers to know that we don't feel they are aware of pedestrians unless we make ourselves super flashy.  I almost want to add a little safety flag to the routine... maybe Calvin can wave it to the drivers as we cross the road.  :)

I definitely feel conspicuous.  I can sense some hostility from some vehicles, though it seems that most drivers are becoming more aware and courteous, now that this routine has been in place for several months.  I wish I could tell people that it is normal to walk your child to school and I am not a weirdo for wanting to do this.  Clearly, the people who think I am crazy have never been to Vermont, where drivers practically wreck themselves in order to stop for a pedestrian.

Things that would change the safety and maybe the culture of the area to increase walkers... speed bumps, enforcement of the 25 mph speed limit in the school zone (there is no way people are driving 25), a painted crosswalk with signs and flashers.  I don't know if it's reasonable for me to even suggest these things, after all, I am a single pedestrian.  But, if other people felt that walking was going to be safer, maybe more people would do it.

So, what does this mean in the future?   Maybe running for town council?